Do women ever approach men first?

The science (and what women themselves say) may surprise you…

Let’s be clear – I’m talking about girls approaching you for social/romantic reasons… such as to find out whether you’re worth getting to know better… and possibly even hook up.

Despite what society and some women say, and despite many men’s lack of such experiences, the fact is that women DO approach men and make the first move, both with men they haven’t met, and with men they are acquainted with and would like to get to know better.


Three sources confirm that women approach men. I’ll dive deeper into each in future articles:

  • First, scientists have actually studied and verified this. After observing female animals – including species closely related to us like chimpanzees – initiating the courtship sequence, they looked into whether human females did the same thing. In other words, do women approach men first… or otherwise signal to a man that she wants him to approach her?The answer they found to both questions: yes.
  • Second, the real world experiences of myself and other men have confirmed it repeatedly. It is a great feeling when a woman approaches you. That electrical tension, that excitement, that potential for a powerful connection.
  • Third and most importantly, many women themselves (not all, of course) acknowledge that they approach men. They reveal so in online forums, scientific surveys, and in conversations I’ve had with them.

Some people will tell you it’s the man’s job to approach. Some women will tell you they don’t approach men.

Part of the reason people believe women don’t approach men is that a woman’s approach is often much more subtle than a man’s.

I’m very glad that those people were wrong…

Women approaching me was especially helpful back when I was painfully shy… It helped me develop confidence, and i’m embarrassed to say, realize that I wasn’t fundamentally unattractive to women.

And now that I’m no longer too shy… I’m still very pleased when women approach me to see if we might connect.

And the best part is – if you’re a shy guy who wants to meet women but you don’t want to approach them, who doesn’t want to get rejected…

…I have identified specific things you can do to increase the chances of a woman approaching you. specific things you can do to compel her to approach, and make it easier for her to start an interaction with you.

Check out my other articles on this blog, and stay tuned for more in the future.

I’ll put up a waiting list soon if you want to learn more about my book, and get on the waiting list. And you’ll be able to download a sample from Amazon for free – and I think Amazon has a few different ways you can download it for free borrow it for free as well, (although two of those options require a subscription to an Amazon service).

Good luck out there. Comments and questions are welcome.

– Jay Hod

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