Women Approach You: Wingman Technique

How wingmen can help get women to approach you, even if you’re shy

Introduction and a case study:

(This technique is not included in my first book, which covers my best, specific techniques.)

One way to get women to approach you is to hang out with a guy who’s either good-looking or good with women, or both.

If he’s good-looking, women might approach him and you.

If the guy has good opening game, then he can approach women.

Often girls are in groups, so once he meets one, she and her friends will likely want to be introduced you.

Part of your job as a good wing man is to chat with her friends. Of course, if you’re attracted to them, you might connect with them as well.

If he’s so good-looking that women are intimidated to approach him directly, then another way this can play out is that she approaches you first to introduce her to him.

Do it.

In any of the scenarios above, it may not work out with him and her, and even if it does, her friends will often approach you to find out more about you, possibly connect and hook up.

Here’s the case study:

I was out getting dinner with some buddies.

One of them had strong game, aggressive, dominant… the other one could approach and open well but then killed attraction he inadvertently communicated his neediness, and the fact that he wasn’t yet a man who could lead a woman.

After dinner, we walked across the street to a bar and there stumbled into a sorority party that had rented out the top floor of the bar.

The upstairs was blocked by a bouncer, but many of the sorority girls and their would-be boyfriends spilled into the downstairs area.

So there we were, hanging out. The nice guy approaches a hot blonde and starts a conversation.

Her almost-as-hot light-brunette friend joins them, and soon Nice Guy brings them over to our table and introduces them.

I’m hanging back, letting him run his game, respecting that he opened them.

My other buddy, the one with aggressive game (although his game back then needed some refinement and calibration) — let’s call him Joey Roques (an amalgamation of people I’ve known) — starts focusing on the brunette.

I’m relaxing, enjoying the people watching.


… soon, the dinner catches up with me in a bad way.

I go wait outside the restroom . The guy in there finally finishes, unlocks the door and gets the hell out.

I’m in there quick, and urgently taking care of business.


About 8 minutes later I return to the group, feeling much better.

The hot blonde busts my balls (and this is the first conversation we’ve had all night): where the hell did you go?

I look at her but don’t answer. Then her eyes light up.

Somehow she’s read the situation and my mind perfectly. She says “I know! You were taking a sh-t!”

I’m embarrassed and hate that she read me so well, but I try not to show any of that, and again i don’t answer, shrug my shoulders slightly, and hope she forgets about it.


A few minutes later, I walk away from the group again, and head upstairs to test how easy it might be to get past the bouncer. No luck.. he’s a wall.

When I come back, blondie now thinks that upstairs might also be where I had gone the first time.

Another 10 minutes or so ⌚️, and she can’t stand the Nice Guy.

I’ve stayed aloof the whole night. She’s starting to get into me. Unlike the Nice Guy, I’m clearly not desperate or needy.

He’s already ruined his chances. Now I start interacting with her, busting her chops. I call out her brattiness. She steps up to me and says something about slapping me or kneeing me in the balls or whatever. Of course, I don’t let that phase me.

Soon she’s telling me she would “literally marry me”.

Joey Roques is doing well with the brunette.

The night goes on. Soon the blonde’s telling me she would “literally f— me”.

It’s getting interesting. She sits on my lap, and her lips are close to mine. I know she wants to kiss, but Nice Guy is right there. He sees exactly what’s going on, but I’m trying not to rub it in.

I decide to try to find another girl for him. I stop a group of 7 girls walking down the street. It’s a 21st birthday party. Several are hot. One is extremely beautiful and thin like a model. I introduce the Nice Guy, and they invite us to an after hours club they’re going to.

We bring the blonde and brunette that we’ve been hanging out with, and needless to say I had a great time.

The Nice Guy… didn’t do so well, but neediness has a way of killing attraction.

The next night, we went out again, and I was on a high from the night before. I approached a girl, then introduced Nice Guy to her and her friend. Despite his desperation, he managed (I’ll explain when I write that case study) to get back to the friend’s hotel room.

Good luck out there. Comments and questions are welcome.

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